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live from emerald city 10​.​21​.​2019

by krycek

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about

recorded live october 21st, 2019 at emerald city

lyrics

it will be a longer night than you think
than you think
and its holy

it grieves
because it wants to be green and black
its fucked up
and im fucked up

the middle of it coming apart
sick and sinful and stupid and asking for it
water plain
water plain

the middle parts
sick red and yellow yarn
all the insides coming out

a knot
a leaf
a knife
a spade
the soil
a fern
a knife

it is holy
it is holy
it is holy

and that is to say i will taste a different thing
i will taste red
i will taste red
and i will taste nothing ever again

---

alone and thinner than it deserves to be and written on its underside:
"i am beginning to think the medicine is not strong enough doctor,
i keep having this dream"

a wheel and as it turns, stitches a knot closed
beginning first at a spoke and moving toward the hub inward

something about uncomfortable tightness
the inside of the head is blue and i am immobile
or the inside of the head is blue and i am made to be immobile

and the mind is held for ransom, a rift
a price you cant ever pay

a mirror that reflects somewhere very high from somewhere else very high
impossibly high and angled down from that height to shine a bragging light
to show all my flaws at once
and show me the undersides of them

the ways that i have been made afraid to communicate that are not your fault
but that i remain afraid of
a dream and the fragments that go on moving
i will go on moving inside it forever
a fluttering sensation inside of me at one point
or at whose behest, will i my happy ending manifest
and not nearly worthy or only barely that some sad matter
from a place to live comfortably
some place that i want so very badly
or its own inner workings

i myself offered a palmful of a place that if

i am alone
i have a dream that says
and this is where the dream has in and of itself the audacity to change
and in the light that whatever is left suggesting affirmation
but never really gets there
and is never really perfectly told

---

steam
steam
another bad dream

steam
steam
a hook
to lick the glass edge

and yeah and
and yeah and

an unexpected choke

three oclock
three oclock
four oclock
four

a train is passing
a train is passing
a train is passing

credits

released May 1, 2020

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krycek Cleveland, Ohio

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